Crazy Little Thing Called Love

The following is a true story, which I am posting because
A) I promised Trent
B) its funny
C) awkward dating moments are the fruit of life

This date is entitled: "Why Did I Pick You?"
Last summer there was a boy in my ward that my roommates were certain was in love with me. I wasn't so sure about that, but I could tell there was interest there. I have to admit, I wasn't too interested in him, he'd just barely gotten back from his mission and was therefore, younger than me, and you know how that is. I mainly got a kick out of the fact that my crazy roommate thought I liked him and therefore set about trying to "steal" him from me. I was content to let life continue on like that until he asked me out, bringing our "relationship" to a swift end.
He asked me on a triple date with two of his roommates. When he came to pick me up I asked what we were doing and he said... you guessed it, "we're going to play mini-golf." Sigh. Oh well, at least I had a date. Well, when we got to the course his roommates and their dates started the trash talking, bantering about who would beat who. I admitted to my date honestly that I am a competitive person, and if we weren't doing well I would start playing worse, because even in mini-golf I get stressed out about not winning. Maybe it was because I said it in a light hearted tone, lest he think I would burst in to tears if we lost, which made him think that what he did would be funny... what followed was so utterly ridiculous that to this day I just have to shake my head and laugh when I think about this kid.
The game began and at first I was kicking trash, until about the 5th hole, where it took me about seven strokes to get the ball in the hole. Thats when it started, "man, you really aren't good at this game are you?" I laughed it off at first and said, "I told you, I get all nervous, but don't worry, we can get it back!"
Needless to say, by the last hole I couldn't get the ball to go in for less than six strokes to save my life. Each hole was met with the same response. "Man, if I'd asked someone else, maybe I could have won." Or some such variation on that theme. Even when on one hole I got a hole in one the comment was," man, finally, at least you could get one lucky shot so I won't look like such a loser." All the while I tried harder and harder to turn the topic of conversation to something else. You like the Music Man? So do I! I love musicals... yeah, I am not a mini golf pro... you're right... so we both speak French, lets talk about... my lack of mini golf skillz in French...
By the end of the golf game I was pretty spent, it was impossible however, for the evening to be over. Due to the fact it was a Friday the "we cannot let you go home until 1:30 AM" rule was invoked, and we headed over to someone's apartment for a rousing game of Scum. I did not sit by my date during the entire game. Why not? He didn't win a single hand, and I was constantly the Queen.
Sweet victory.
He never asked me out again.

Comments

trentathon said…
"we cannot let you go home until 1:30 AM rule"? ahahaha i love provo
La Dolcezza said…
Yes. I am all for going home when the date is over, no matter what time that is. It's OK to go home at 9:00, or 11:00, or whenever! Did you let your crazy roommate know that she could have him and his golfing pride?
Bukran said…
"he'd just barely gotten back from his mission"

There's your problem.

Don't date someone who's been home for less than two years. It takes than long to re-integrate into society. I speak from experience.
Chelsea said…
Shoot girl. I was trying to figure out what I would have done in this situation. I really don't know. It's easy to say I would have punched him in the face, but let's face it.. um no. But, oh! I would have also been holding a putter! Even better.

And you can always comment on previous posts. That is one reason I do comment moderation - so I can always make sure I read all comments that come.

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