Mother I Love You, I Love You I Do...

That song is creepy isn't it? Well, today is mother's day, so I wanted to post an homage to my mother. The other day I was in the bookstore looking at mother's day cards, before coming to the remembrance that I had no money and therefore perusing them was useless.

However, I've come to a decision, I hate sappy mother's day cards. While the sentiments of the terribly written poems may be true, where would we be without our mothers? And, we really don't tell them enough how much we appreciate them, I don't think giving your mom a sappy card with a horrible poem that doesn't flow well is going to make up for waking her up in the middle of the night because you had a bad dream, those tween and teen years when you would get in fights and cry, and telling her she treated you like a child and you didn't like it... when you were 9...

There were a few funny cards that I enjoyed. However, I must say, there was one that seemed especially promising from the picture on the front, but then it was sappy. I was angry, and decided to write my own card based on that picture and what I thought it was going to say in the first place.

The outside of the card looked similar to this, except the mother cat was cleaning the kittens. So The front of the card would say,

"Mom, remember how you used to use your own spit to clean dirt off my face when I was younger?"

Inside of the card, "That was gross.

Happy Mother's Day."

I believe this card is perfect. It says, thanks for taking care of me, thanks for making me presentable and teaching me valuable lessons like good hygene, and even though your methods may have been considered a bit unorthodox at times, they got the job done, and I'll never forget the lessons I learned. Plus, it makes her laugh, which is better than some stupid poem that makes her say, "oh thank you..." while thinking, "even on mother's day all I get is this crap?"

I should go into the card making business. Happy Mother's Day mom, I love you, spit and all :)