Welcome to the Black Parade

This post is now going to delve far deeper into myself than any other post ever has, and probably ever will again. Please bear with me however, I have an important point I am wanting to make.
Lately I have been unhappy. That is all there is to it. I have been stressed, tired, worried, sad, and heartbroken. Everyday seems like a viscious cycle of this. I have had good friends that have been very kind to me throughout my selfish time of self disdain and introspection. Lately, I have been feeling like I need to get out and do some service. You know, everyone says that we need to learn to accept service from other people but 1) I've never been good at that, cause it makes me feel guilty because 2) if we allow it for too long it simply becomes self indulgence.
I knew I needed more than just small acts of service, although I do need to try and engage in those more often as well. I needed a large organized project to get my mind off of focusing negatively and inwardly and more on focusing positively outwardly. So tonight I went and saw the movie Invisible Children. This is a documentary that tells the heartbreaking tale of children in Uganda who have to trek into the city every night to sleep in bus stops and hospitals to try and keep themselves fom being kidnapped by the rebel army and turned into soldiers that then go and slaughter other children.
There was one moment in the film where one child, who had escaped from the army was talking about his brother whom they had killed and what he would say to him right now if he were here. This child, who had trained himself not to cry, because crying meant they would kill you too, broke down into tears and wept loudly. As I watched him my heart broke thinking of all the things that should be in a childhood that had been taken away from his.
I began to wonder what I could do and then I remembered, I have a blog. So I am here to tell you all about this project. If you click on the title of the film it is actually a link to their website where you can learn more about their project and ways you can get involved. I cannot stand idly by, consumed in the things in my life that are hard for me, but can really be controlled by me, as these children live their lives in something that goes far beyond fear.
Some people may say this is a bit fanatical to focus on one problem with all the plethora of problems facing people in several areas of the world. All I have to say is, if we don't start somewhere, how can we ever learn to help anyone?
Please visit the website and try to think of ways you can help. If this inspires you to take on some project to help someone else in some other way, then thats great. This is a trial that really matters, and I hope we can all do our part to help those that cannot help themselves.


BitterTea said…
I think it is a wonderful thing you are doing, by promoting this in your blog.

I guess we have not been in touch enough to be there for eachother for awhile but if you want to talk, you have my number and my email.
Anonymous said…
I'm sorry you are so unhappy. You have so many reasons not to be. As I read lower in your blog, I see that you have a great family, roommates, friends. You've been to Hawaii and you're going to college. I wonder how many kids would love to have those things and can't for whatever reason. You have many, many blessings. Don't forget those. We all have aspects of our life that, if we focus on them, depress us. If you do, compare yourself (and what you have) to others and say thank you to your Father in Heaven. He has blessed you so much for your faithfulness in the previous life and this one. Say Thank You to him tonight!
Bukran said…
Road trip to Denver... Booyeah.

You think you could handle an 8 hour car ride with Chris?
Mom said…
I haven't looked yet, but I wonder if the church is sending humanitarian aide there. I wouldn't doubt it and perhaps there is a way we can help through that as well. It really does help to give service to others and to lose ourselves in that awhile. It gives us a better perspective of our lives and our missions in Heavenly Father's plan. I know he loves us and he loves those children in Uganda as well. It is so hard to see tragic events like this and to wonder why they have to happen. Our ability to deal with them and to help combat sin and unrighteousness in the world is part of our test here on earth. I am going to email you some more personal info. But for all of you readers out there, especially you students, I want you to know that I remeber how stressful being a college student can be and not only a college student, but a young adult who is beginning to make their way in the world alone. There are going to be those moments when you feel so low and have to find ways to pull yourself out of that. That old 60's saying of "finding yourself", is really not so untrue. You are at a place now when you are finding yourself and defining who you are and who you will become. It is not an easy process. But this I know, Lindsey, you will make it alright because you know already a part of who you are, a daughter of God, a daughter of parents who love you, and a person with a testimony and intelligence. You know to whom to turn for your strength. You are beautiful inside and out. You may not realize that, but you are and as you come to know yourself and improve yourself in the areas that you see fit, you will find the inner peace to accept that truth. I love you.

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